Superwoman of Candidates' Wives for the Day

 Herman often entertains the idea of becoming a political candidate for statewide office every once in awhile.  I just smile at him and allow him his dream, knowing that there is no way on this big green earth that I could ever live through it.  I don't know how political spouses do it.  I could not sit day after day and read/hear other people who don't know him sit around and mock or yell about Herman and his beliefs.  It would tear me up to hear those sorts of things every day.  I would feel this need to forcefully defend him and would not be thinking happy thoughts most days as I composed all of my strongly worded emails in response.  So I'm afraid Herman's political aspirations are probably going to end at the local level.

But, having said that, I do support him with all my heart as he campaigns and serves on the school board.  He first ran for school board three years ago and won one of the two available spots at that time.  The weird thing about that campaign was that it was fairly hotly contested with several candidates who were very interested in winning the spot.  Herman was fairly laid back about the whole thing.  He figured that people would choose him if they wanted for him to be on the board, and they wouldn't choose him if they didn't.  Either way he would be okay.  He just wanted the opportunity to stay involved with the district after having worked there for ten previous years.  Although Herman was fairly laid back about things, there was a weird sort of whisper campaign against him.  People we knew would come up to us and tell us that some others in the community were spreading falsehoods about Herman.  Really?  Does politics get nasty this early at the local level for something like school board?  Ridiculous.  But it happened.  Luckily it was under the table most of the time so I didn't have to deal with it directly.  Herman won, and he has enjoyed his time on the board for the past three years.

So now it is re-election time.  Herman has said that he isn't going to put a lot of effort into advertising for this.  He figures that people in the community know who he is, for the most part, and they have either liked him as a school board member or they haven't, and they'll vote accordingly.  So it hasn't been that rigorous of a campaign season for us.  However, the CTA for our district always sponsors a Meet the Candidates Night that is broadcast on the local TV station for people to view in the weeks leading up to the election.  That night was last evening.  I knew we had something important to do yesterday evening, but for the life of me I could not remember what that was.  Usually I write these things down.  We should have had no problem remembering because they reminded Herman at the board meeting on Monday.  And yet we forgot . . . and the story begins.

I was sitting at home getting ready to begin dinner at 5:25 last evening when I got a frantic call from Herman.  He had been mowing the lawns at some of the properties we own when his google calendar reminder popped up to let him know that he had a Meet the Candidates event at 5:30.  He was wearing his mowing shorts (i.e. trashy), a Rick Perry for President t-shirt (I would also say trashy, but I'll let you make your own conclusions there), and socks and shoes stained with the latest grass clippings.  He was a bit of a mess.  But the broadcast was going to begin at 5:30, so he was just going to head over to the high school and do it as he was.  He asked me if I could possibly try to get him his suit there ASAP.  

I walked into my room, threw on my Candidate SuperWife Cape, and got to work.  I grabbed all of his dress clothes, socks, shoes, and even a wet washcloth in case he was covered in sweat (we didn't want a Nixon on TV moment here) and was out in the car within 45 seconds of hanging up from Herman's call, making sure to take time to yell out dinner instructions to Savannah as I flew out the door.  Then I high tailed it to the high school (mostly legally -- I was behind a VERY cautious driver).  After parking I flew out of the car and ran to the high school entrance.  Now, I was in pretty good shape before we headed to China -- not Kristi Sexton or Kori Lopez kind of good shape -- but good for Melissa sort of shape.  But since we returned to the US I haven't been much of a workout mama.  So I am not in the best shape for sprints.  I also am not very comfortable with running in front of other people.  I am super conscious of my jiggling middle section and a tendency to huff a bit too much with the exertion.  Who wants to see that?  But as I left my van carrying Herman's clothes I raced across the sidewalk to the front entrance of the school.  I don't think I have run like that since junior high.  The groups of students standing around stared at me, wondering, I'm sure, what had possessed this strange lady running to their school.  I did get a nice little compliment as I reached the door.  A man walking out asked me if I was there because I was in the band.  Only after looking at me for a few seconds did he realize that I was not a student.  I didn't mind losing a few minutes for that.  I mean it isn't every day that a forty year old mom of seven gets confused for a high school band student.  So that made my day.  Yea!  

But the race continued.  The broadcast was in the high school library which is located on the third floor of the building, so I needed to run up the three flights of stairs to get to Herman.  I booked it, feeling a little part of me die a bit with each step I ran.  My poor body was not prepared for this sprint.  But I did it.  I could not allow Herman to appear on TV in a Rick Perry for President shirt.  My conscience could not allow it.  I would have to purchase a spot to explain why he owned the shirt.  I mean -- Rick Perry!  No offense to the legion of Perry fans out there, but I couldn't have it.  So I continued to run with that thought fueling my speed to unreachable heights.  And I made it.  I ran into the library at 5:33.  The broadcast had begun.  I started to collapse at the entrance when I saw that all of my hard work had been in vain, because there sat Herman in between two other candidates dressed in their Sunday best while he sat there seeming to proudly be proclaiming his love for Rick Perry.  Oh my!  But while the first candidate was speaking about who she was Herman swapped with the third candidate to let that candidate go before him, and Herman ran to the back to grab the clothes and change in a conference room attached to the library.  After doing his own Superman quick change he walked out to the meeting and was ready when his turn came to introduce himself.  Disaster averted.  Hurray!

I sat and watched the broadcast which was very good.  There are three very good candidates running this year.  It took me forever to get my breath again.  I must have panted for a good fifteen minutes after I arrived as my body forcefully disagreed with my choice to tax it so harshly.  Thank goodness the mikes were set up in such a way that it didn't pick up the wheezing from the audience.  And today I'm a bit sore.  But I was there supporting my good sweetheart in his quest to continue as a representative on the school board for our wonderful school district.  Maybe only Herman knows just what a feat it was for me to get to him in that amount of time -- I totally ran my flabby behind through a crowded parking lot and up three flights of stairs for him -- but I was happy to do it.  I love the guy, after all!  

For those of you who are Waynesville school district voters, the election is on April 3rd.  Here's Herman's slightly outdated profile on the district website HERE.