How To Snag Yourself an Awesome Missionary

Elder Davies trying to come up with some lyrics to describe Elder Urban,
while Elder Urban accompanies him on the ukelele.

Okay. Before anyone gets too worried about our family interactions with our great missionaries ... the title of this post is a bit misleading. You'll just have to read on to get the whole story.

I usually have a hard time feeling comfortable around the missionaries that come through our area. Well, to be honest, I have a hard time feeling comfortable around anyone until I get to know them a little better. Drat my infernal shyness! But since the missionaries are generally not here for very long I don't interact with them enough to ever feel at ease. By the time I get to that point they are usually transferred out. But there are people out there who I instantly connect with. I usually attribute that to elements in their personality that just make it easier for me to open up and be myself. That's the way I felt when I first met Herman. It was like we had been best friends forever, even though I'd just met him. And I have met a few people throughout my life who are just like that. Generally with the missionaries Herman is the one being the social butterfly, and I hang on for the ride. 

Right now we have some missionaries serving, however, who I have really felt comfortable with. They are great young men who are diligently serving in our area, and they can be tons of fun too. I haven't volunteered to feed the missionaries very often in the past several years because I have found that any time I sign up Herman ends up having a surprise meeting scheduled, so we just end up sending the missionaries out for pizza. And now I've gotten so out of the habit of having them over for dinner that I get a bit flustered trying to get it all together. But it all works out. Last night we were scheduled to have the missionaries over for dinner, but I had thought that we were going to have to send them out for pizza again because Laney had a date scheduled with a young man from the Springfield area who wanted Herman and I to come along too. That's right, there is actually some guy out there who thinks that Herman and I are cool enough to double date with! How cool is that! Well, it ended up that the date got pushed back a week so we were able to have the missionaries over. ... And it ended up being probably the funniest and most enjoyable missionary dinner I have ever hosted.

And I've got to share!

You know how I've mentioned in previous posts how much Herman likes to talk about his dating philosophies and finding your future spouses? No? Well, it's true. He likes to talk about this ... a lot. And he has some very strong views on the topic. Very strong. Lots of the views I agree with. Lots I think are over the top. Hopefully between the two of us we won't totally scar our children as they grow up. Well, last night we ended up talking with the missionaries about Herman's dating philosophy. I think that things got started when Herman asked the missionaries (again!) if they had a girl waiting for them back home. Elder Urban said that he had had a girlfriend, but she hadn't written him in nine months. And he didn't have anyone else really writing him either. Elder Davies, on the other hand, apparently has dozens and dozens of girls writing him and sending him perfumed pictures with kiss marks all over them. After joking about this for a few minutes Herman told Laney and Savannah that they needed to sing Elder Urban a happy song on their ukeleles that would cheer him up. So Laney sang this song:

It turned out that the lyrics weren't quite as uplifting as Herman was hoping for. Oh how I wish that I had a video of this! So, so funny! Especially Elder Urban's fake tears at the end of it.

The next topic of conversation was Herman's ideas about how Laney should be dating. For those of you who haven't heard, check out my post HERE. The short explanation is that Laney should be dating often, with as many different young men as possible, and we are willing to drive her to the ends of the earth to find these great young men if we have to. Oh. And he thinks that Laney should not date anyone exclusively until she thinks she is ready to start thinking about marriage. Herman believes (and for the most part I agree, although not so militantly) that dating in the teen years is all about figuring out who you are and what you like, and if you start pairing off and dating exclusively then you are cutting off those opportunities to do that. He thinks that you should only begin exclusive dating when you are ready to announce to the world that you are ready to be married. That led to the elders and Herman planning out Laney's transition to the world of exclusive dating. They all decided that Laney should throw a Debut Ball, inviting all who attend to know that Laney is now getting serious about dating. Only serious suitors need apply. As creepy as this discussion might sound in a blog post, it was actually hilarious. And Herman is way serious about actually doing this. I will devote myself to preventing this from happening.

Laney deserves a medal for her patience in all of this discussion. Really.

And all of this led up to the final dating discussion of the night: How to Snag Yourself an Awesome Missionary. Herman's plan for Laney, once she has her huge Debut Ball and is serious about finding Mr. Awesome, is for her to dedicate herself to being a diligent writer of boys who are on their mission. He plans on encouraging her to write several missionaries at once, systematically leading each one of them to fall desperately in love with her (but not too much in love -- they've got to be devoting the majority of their enthusiasm to serving the Lord on their missions). Just to be clear -- these are Herman's grand designs, not Laney's. And I tried really, really hard to be the voice of reason in this discussion. But, you know, Herman likes to form these sorts of plans, and sometimes it's best to just nod along happily and then make your own plans later on. Because his plans can be ridiculous ... and impractical ... and unrealistic. But I do love the guy. I can't help myself! He's too funny!

Well, the missionaries were more than willing to offer their own advice about the best way to write missionaries. Obviously Elder Davies is the master at this since he is getting hundreds of letters a week from girls all over the country, all creepily perfumed and lipstick marked. So he's seen good writers and he's seen creepy writers. Elder Urban mostly spoke from his experience of watching his companions get letters. (But don't feel too sorry for Elder Urban world! He's got a rock solid plan to meet Taylor Swift, convert her, and then marry her -- all after he becomes the rookie MVP of the MLB playoffs. He'll be okay, I'm sure!) As the two of them started spouting off advice it got intense. There was lots of rapid fire sentences being thrown out with lots of enthusiasm. Obviously they felt pretty strongly about the way that girls were writing them. The whole time I kept thinking, "I should be writing all of this down. This seems pretty important." Or at least it might be important if Laney actually was going to put Herman's mastermind plan into action. And she's not. At least not the way he has laid it out. Not as long as I can spend my days preventing it. Have I mentioned that Laney might need a few prayers thrown her direction so that she can survive her parents? No? Well, that might be a good idea.

I wish that I had written this post last night when my memories were fresh, but I'm getting old and my mind is a bit mushier than it used to be. For now, here are the pointers the elders gave Laney for Operation Snag an Awesome Missionary:

• Don't be creepy.
• Talk about your life, the fun things you are doing -- but not the dates you've been on.
• Wait three weeks to send another letter if your last one was not answered
• But do write again, even if your last letter wasn't answered, because sometimes missionaries get busy and forget to write 
• Talk about funny things in your life
• Send a care package no more than once a quarter
• Don't send too many letters or your missionary will start to worry that you are taking him away from the work. Once a week is sufficient. Twice a month is better.
• Don't start planning your engagement or the wedding. Don't make assumptions. Missionaries get a bit creeped out when you start asking their opinions about announcements or wedding colors.
• Share awesome missionary experiences you are having. They like those!

Such a funny, funny night! I love our missionaries! And just in case you are worried that they just sit around all day and have these sorts of interactions with all of us -- they are actually very hard working young men! They are great missionaries and a great companionship! And it turns out that they might be able to start a career when they go home ... writing an advice blog for young women hoping to catch their perfect man who is out serving his mission. 

Elder Davies and Elder Urban. To the future!

Nineteen Things

Last Tuesday was my nineteenth anniversary. Feels like it was only yesterday that Herman and I were married in Denver, but nineteen years is a long time with a lot of memories. On our anniversary I added a post about our amazing sealing to Minsy, but I wanted to take a bit of time to add another post about my amazingly amazing husband. 'Cause I love him ... and he's perfect for me in everyway ... and I can't stop being super, duper grateful that he is mine FOREVER ... and this week is a perfect week to write my feelings down so that somebody out there who might care about these things someday in the future will have a record. And since it is my nineteenth anniversary, what better way to celebrate these feelings than by sharing nineteen things I love about Herman? But I've got to warn you: It might be a bit gushy. Sorry.

So here goes:

1. His Amazingly Enthusiastic Singing Voice

One of the first things I noticed about Herman when he got off of his mission was his singing. I was leading the music at our little university branch, and I sooo appreciated his singing. He's got such a loud voice as he sings. I'll tell you a weird high school fantasy that I had. You see, I was a Les Miserables fanatic. I LOVED that musical! Still do! And I listened to the soundtrack over and over and over. And I absolutely LOVED the voice of the man who played Enjolras, the leader of the student rebellion. I wanted to marry that man. I was going to join the orchestra of some traveling Les Mis production and marry that guy. It was a lock tight plan ... except that I didn't have professional level talent when it came to playing the trumpet, and I didn't really have the great lady skills it was going to take to nab some awesome broadway talented guy. So it was just a dream. You can say that "I Dreamed a Dream." Get it? Do you? You know, from the musical? Anyway ..... it turned out that I didn't nab my broadway singer, but I did nab a guy with an enthusiasm for singing that is infectious. One of my friends told me that one of the things that she missed most when our wards split last year was hearing Herman sing while he was on the stand. I miss that too since he is now traveling with his stake calling. But luckily I can still hear him sing at home. I love it ... most of the time. I have to admit I did wish that his voice was not quite so loud and enthusiastic when he started singing New York, New York while we were in line to head to the top of the Empire State Building a few years ago. But I guess I can't pick and choose my moments to enjoy the blessing of Herman's voice, can I?


2. His Enthusiasm for EVERYTHING

Herman is just one giant ball of enthusiasm. For everything. Whether he is talking about church or his business or his family or politics or music or whatever comes his way, he is excited about it. It is hard not to have lots of that enthusiasm rub off when you are around him. And I love that. It makes all of life exciting and fun!

3. His Ability to Make Me Laugh

I like to be silly. Really silly. Not everyone would guess that about me, I think. Probably because it takes a little while for me to get comfortable enough with people to show that side of my personality. But I love to laugh. Cue the Mary Poppins music! Ha.Ha.Ha.Ha. And Herman can get me into giggling fits like no one else on earth ... except for maybe Savannah. I love to hear him recount conversations he has had with the kids. Or stories about our life together. I think there are things that have happened to us since we've been married that we will laugh about into the eternities. One story that will probably only be funny to us, I'm sure: I had graduated college and was waiting around for Laney to be born. So I took a college lit class with Herman for enjoyment. We wrote our first papers and both felt good about them. Mine was six pages long. Herman's was a half of a page. His was entitled "The Wonderful Similarities Between Frederick Douglass and Benjamin Franklin." When Dr. Closser (LOVE HIM!) handed our papers back I got a big fat A, and Herman's paper only had a giant question mark on it. No grade. I think Dr. Closser was amazed that anyone had ever turned in such a paper to him. You'd be surprised how many of our life events mirrored that moment. So we laugh about it a lot.

4. His Ability to "Talk Me Down"

I can freak out about little things every once in a while. It is very helpful to be married to a man who can talk me back from the ledge and help me to see that things are not as dire as I might think that they are. Case in point: For the past two days Herman has been at youth conference with Laney and Savannah. Well, on day one of his absence my thumb on my right hand started shaking uncontrollably. You never realize how important your thumbs are until you can't use them. And I couldn't use this thumb for anything. I couldn't carry the dishes to the table from the kitchen. I couldn't type. I couldn't use a pencil. It was no fun. No fun at all. Well, I decided to be an informed patient and headed to the internet to see what it could be. And what could it be? Only something like Parkinson's Disease, or Lou Gehrig's Disease, or any number of neurological disorders that sounded extremely vexing. I remembered that I heard Michael J. Fox in an interview once saying that the first time he knew that something was wrong with him was when he couldn't get his thumb to stop twitching. Yikes! I was beginning to freak out. So when Herman got a break and was able to call me I told him all that I had learned. He talked me through everything, listening patiently while I expressed my concerns, and then telling me that it was too early to worry about anything. He suggested a good night's sleep and then told me to see how I felt in the morning. Well, it seems that all is well. It was probably just that I had overworked my poor thumb that day, and my body was trying to tell me to take a break. I'm glad for his calm in the face of my concerns. He could have easily wound me up with worry, but he made me feel better and more relaxed. And he does that a lot. Hallelujah!

5. His Ability to Forgive Freely

I have never met anyone who can be as forgiving as Herman. He has had people say extremely hurtful things to him. People who should never, ever say such things. And often these people are projecting their anger onto him, not for things that he has actually said or done, but because these people harbor their own worries about various things and need someone to blame. This doesn't happen to him a lot (generally I would say that he is a hard guy to hate), but when it does I am always AMAZED at his willingness to put aside his pride and do whatever it takes to make things right. Sometimes I ask him why he does this, why he lets other people think that they are right when they treat him so wrong. Herman just explains that the relationships he forms with others is way more important than him holding onto some sense of winning an argument. He is such an example to me in this area.

6. His Love of the Gospel

Do you know one of the things I love most about Herman? One of the first things I noticed about him? His testimony! And it isn't just that he knows that the Gospel is true. He does. But it is that he has such an enthusiasm in his love. He is excited about it! He doesn't just live the life because it is what he is supposed to do. He lives it because it is AWESOME! Living the Gospel life with him is a blast! And I can totally see that infectious enthusiasm rubbing off on our kids. Love it!

7. His Amazing Blessings

It is such a blessing having the priesthood in my home. And one of the great blessings that comes along with that is the opportunity for us to receive priesthood blessings in time of need. I have such a testimony of the power of these blessings. And Herman is full of so much faith when it comes to administering them. One of the things that I love most about his blessings is the way that he words them. He knows just how to phrase words to make them mean the most to me. I can't even begin to count the number of times that I have been comforted by those words. Or guided in a decision. Love them!

8. His Love for Our Children

I love to watch Herman and the kids interact. Whether they are moments of serious discussion or extreme goofiness, I can see his love for them. He is definitely the fun parent between the two of us. I love that he is always thinking twenty years into the future as he talks to them and guides them. He cares about their choices and wants the very best for them. And he is their biggest cheerleader. Seeing him laughing uncontrollably while playing with the kids is one of my greatest joys.

9. His Blind Belief in My Gorgeousness

I'll admit that it can be a bit embarrassing for Herman to introduce me to others as his "Hot Wife." I can just see the faces of these people with their "I could do better" looks plastered on. But you know what? It is awesome to be married to a man who thinks that I am the most gorgeous woman on the planet. Am I? Not even close. I'm not delusional. But I am the most beautiful woman to him, and that is the most important thing. The older I get and the more my body starts to age, the more beautiful he makes me feel. And it is a truth generally acknowledged that every single woman wants to feel beautiful to someone. So I love him a lot for that.

10. His Enthusiasm for Our Business

Several times we have been out at dinner with new people who have moved into our area, and they ask Herman, "So what do you do for a living?" Oh no. Get ready because we are going to be in for a long, detailed discussion of the joys of starting our own business. He loves to talk about our little business. And he is a big believer in others working for themselves as well. I think that he has probably convinced half of the missionaries who have come through our area to stay away from traditional forms of income and head off on their own to live the American dream. It's fun to watch him get 'in the zone' when he is talking about these things. But it can be a long conversation.

11. His "Plans" for the Future

Herman likes to make plans. He has lots and lots of ideas about where he sees us and our children in many years. Some of them are brilliant. Some of them are eccentric. Some are a bit scary. But it sure is fun to hear him talk about what he'd like for our life to look like as we age. I can't wait until the kids get engaged because Herman has some hilarious ideas of how he is going to 'test' potential spouses to make sure they make the cut in his mind. We'll see how that turns out. Luckily for them, I'm around to temper some of those grand plans.

12. His "Three Things" Conversations

Speaking of potential spouses, one of Herman's favorite thing to talk about with our older kids and other youth in the church is their list of the top three qualities that are most important to them as they look for a future spouse. I LOVE it when Herman takes the missionaries out to lunch right before they transfer out of our area. We get a lot of missionaries who are heading home after serving here, so he loves to have this conversation with them. He gives them the opportunity to list three things and then he systematically tears their choices down. Well, he doesn't exactly tear them down. He just debates them to make sure that they really mean for those to be the top three choices. Always an interesting conversation. "Looks" at number one, Elder Syme? The most important thing? Really? He definitely lost lots of cool points after that discussion in my mind. But I think Herman talked him through things. He'll be just fine. But anyway, Herman does have some great convos about this when he talks to anyone. At least it gets people to think.

13. His Love of the Adventure


Whenever we go traveling anywhere Herman always loves to say, "It'll be an adventure!" When we headed to China we had the opportunity to go on guided tours all through the country. But instead we decided to do it on our own. And it was an adventure! We got lost. We wandered through little Chinese neighborhoods off the beaten path. We had tons of things go wrong that ended up being soooo fun. So I am grateful that I am married to a man who doesn't mind taking the road less traveled to see where it takes us. I love our Blau Family Adventures!

14. His Weird Obsession with 'Sticking it to "The Man"'

Whenever we go out to eat a buffets Herman is always telling the kids that we have a responsibility to 'stick it to the Man' as we eat. That means that you don't eat the crust of pizza so that you can get more pizza in you from the buffet. That way the price per plate goes significantly down. If they offer you free cheese on your burger, you take it. You know, stuff like that. We don't all follow this philosophy, but some of us are big believers. Even when Herman is not around I'll have Hyrum say, "Look Mom! I'm totally sticking it to the Man!" Well done, Hy-guy. Well done.

15. His Other Weird Obsession with Stockpiling

      Military Gear that He Finds at Thrift Stores

Since Spencer started getting into scouts a few years ago Herman has been madly collecting any spare military gear he can find in order to make Spencer's scouting experience be awesome. Since we live in a military community it is pretty easy for Herman to find some great deals at the local thrift shops. Did I ever tell you about the time his excitement for these deals potentially could have ruined an awesome girls camp devotional I had planned? No? Well here is the post where I wrote about it HERE. I tease him about this, but I do know this one thing: Team Blau is totally going to be ready for the Zombie Apocalypse. We've got your back world!

16. His Willingness to Walk the Length of the Earth to

      Help Me When I am in Need

This I know ... If I am ever in trouble I can depend on Herman. He will do whatever it takes to help me. No matter where he is or what he is doing, he'll be there. He is definitely my rock!

17. His Belief in My Great Talent

I can find a lot of things wrong with me. I have no problem noticing my flaws. But Herman always sees the best in me. Always. When I was called to teach seminary last winter I think that it is safe to say that I felt quite a bit underqualified. I thought there were any number of people who could have done a better job than me. But Herman was my cheerleader. He told me all of the reasons that he felt like I was the best for this job. He told me why the youth needed me to be there for them. He told me that I could do it! Having someone believe in my so much makes such a difference as I approach difficult tasks. I love that!

18. His Ability to Motivate Me/Anyone

Herman can take the weakest link in a chain and somehow motivate it to become the strongest. I don't know how he does it. It really is a gift, I think. All I know is that Herman is able to motivate me to do things that I know I could not do otherwise. And that is amazingly awesome! I am all that I am because of him and his belief in me and his ability to help me climb a little higher each and every day!

19. His Ability to Always Put Me At Ease


What makes a great marriage? Two people who can feel free to be exactly who they are. There are no secrets or acts. They are real. And they are comfortable with each other, constantly being their best and working to be even better. Things may not always be smooth, and they might make mistakes along the way, but ultimately they are at their best with each other without having to work at it too much. And that is how I feel with Herman. He has always put me at ease, making me happy to simply be me ... not what I think he needs me to be, but simply me. I have felt like he was my best friend from our very first date. And nineteen years later I feel exactly the same way. ...Well, I think that actually I feel even more deeply than I did back then. But I am soooo grateful to be married to my best friend, a man who always makes me feel most comfortable. Being married to him has always felt like coming HOME.

No Empty Chairs

I absolutely LOVE this picture!
A little side note ...
In order to get this great angle I had to lay down on the concrete at the bottom of the steps.
That concrete felt like it was 250 degrees. I felt like a toaster strudel by the time I took this pic.
But it was worth it!

I am finding this to be an extremely difficult post to write. I started writing yesterday when all of my feelings were fresh, but wasn't feeling it as I wrote. My words seemed completely inadequate. How can any blog post I write adequately describe a perfect day? It just won't. Nothing I write could compare to the experience. After getting a bit of sleep last night I approached this again, hoping my writing neurons would be firing at full speed. I deleted a bunch of the things I wrote yesterday and started over. We'll see how it turns out.

Get ready world, this is probably going  to be another one of those Melissa posts that uses the word 'amazing' way too much. Sorry for that.

For this post I don't want to talk so much about specific experiences. Instead I want to talk about my feelings. I feel like we had a choice opportunity as a family today. It was truly a gift. Today all nine of of our family members entered the St. Louis Missouri Temple so that Minsy could officially be sealed to us for time and all eternity. And it was ... AMAZING!

For those who are not familiar with the doctrines of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, we believe that families are eternal, that the family relationships that we cherish in this life can be with us forever. Our families do not end at our death. They continue into eternity. We believe that it is through the sealing power of the holy priesthood in sacred temples that this can take place. And we believe that every single person who ever lives on earth will have the opportunity to receive this blessing if they so desire. For Herman and I, our eternal family began on July 24, 1993 when we were married in the Denver Colorado Temple. Because we were married in the temple, each of our children were "Born in the Covenant", meaning that they were automatically sealed to us as a family forever. It wasn't necessary for us to go back to the temple to specially seal them to us because it was already a done deal. But last November we adopted Minsy from China. Minsy was not our biological child, so she was not automatically sealed to us. In order to include her in our eternal family we needed to go to a temple and participate in a simple (but amazing) ceremony to add her to our eternal family. I'm sure this might not make tons of sense for those who aren't very familiar with our beliefs, but trust me when I say that it is something that I believe with all my heart, and it brings great joy to my family to know that we will be together FOREVER. If you have any more questions, I'd invite you to check out the official Church website for info HERE.

So, anyway, we knew that we needed to be sealed to Minsy. Technically we could have had this done as soon as we returned home from China since she was already legally adopted. But I waited. We were still debating what age she was going to be since she was so tiny, and I kind of wanted to wait and see how that was going to turn out. I wanted to wait until we had designated a firm birthday for her. That finally happened last month when we had our pediatric endocrinologist explain that he felt as if it was best to leave her age the same and work with that information. So we did. And now it was time to get this sealing underway. We decided that we wanted for Minsy to be sealed to us on our anniversary. Our eternal family began on July 24th, 1993, and we thought that it would be fitting that it was completed on July 24th, 2012. 

Herman teaching the Family Home Evening lesson
on the grounds of the temple.

We decided to drive up to St. Louis a day early so that we could have a Family Home Evening on the grounds of the temple and tell the kids what to expect the next day. We had the hardest time getting ourselves out the door, so we didn't get up to St. Louis until almost 8 pm. The temple gates were closed, so we just sat on the outside lawn where we could still see the temple as we had our lesson. I could just feel the excitement that the kids had as they talked about going inside the temple the next day. You know, it isn't a common thing for youth to be able to enter the temple and see a sealing. Most don't get the chance to see one until they are attending their own sealing when they are much older. So this was going to be a big deal for our kids. And they knew it. So they asked lots of questions and shared their feelings about what they expected the day to be like for them. One of our best Family Home Evenings ever.

I will say this about my feelings as the day progressed on Monday ... I was off. I just felt frazzled, and the feeling would not go away. Urg! At 11 pm I realized with horror that I had forgotten to bring our adoption paperwork with us, and that was essential in order to be sealed the next day. We were two hours away from home. Herman was willing to drive back to pick it up, but I didn't want him to make the four hour round trip beginning so late at night. I was a bit distraught, but Herman was nice and calm for us both. He came up with a plan, called his brother who was driving up for the sealing the next day, and Casey agreed to break into our house and grab the papers on his way through town. Hurray! All was saved. Still, I was knocked a bit off my game. That night at about 2 am we heard a knock on our door. Herman got up and found JoJo outside the door wearing nothing but a pair of underwear, in tears. He had woken up to go to the bathroom and somehow found himself out in the hall. This is not an unusual occurrence. He's a bit of a hotel sleep walker. Last year when we were staying at a hotel in Nauvoo we were awoken at about the same time by a man who was staying at the hotel. He had JoJo with him. JoJo had woken up and left our room, but then he got lost and was wandering the halls crying. Luckily the hotel was a small one, and everyone there had met Herman and the kids earlier that night while they were swimming. So he knew to look for us. Still, that FREAKED me out big time. I slept by the door that night because I was terrified of JoJo walking out and getting lost. Last night I thought that we would be okay since the hotel had a latch to keep the door shut. I didn't think JoJo could work that latch. Obviously I was wrong. JoJo returned to us, safe and sound, but I couldn't sleep at all. So I grabbed my book and read a chapter or two and tried to go asleep again. Eventually I fell asleep.

My night of quasi sleep did not help my weird mood. I wasn't really grumpy ...  just off. And I didn't want to be off today. Well, it is in moments like this one that I am soooo grateful to have the priesthood in my home. Herman gave me a blessing to help me get back on track. I won't share any specifics about that blessing. It is too sacred to me. I will say this ... Herman is so good at giving priesthood blessings. In some ways he is like a poet as he blesses me with the things that I need in those blessings. His words ... I just love the way he phrases things. And this blessing was ...AMAZING. It was exactly what I needed. It brought me to tears, and I don't normally cry during blessings. But I could really feel Heavenly Father's love for me and for my family as I listened to the words that Herman spoke. It was just perfect. Then almost immediately a couple of things happened that eased a couple of worries I had been harboring. I don't really want to explain just what happened. Partly because I want to hold those acts close to me, and partly because if I explained what they were I am sure that they would seem ridiculously trivial. But I know that Heavenly Father influenced a couple of people out there to act in a way that was going to help me in this time of need. I LOVE those little moments when I receive a tiny reassurance that Heavenly Father is looking out for me. He's got my back ... ALWAYS.

Now for my feelings about our experience at the temple yesterday. I truly do not know what to say. I just hope that the images of that experience will stay burned on my consciousness FOREVER. You know, when we went to see JD's sealing at the Draper Utah Temple two weeks ago (Check out my post about this wonderful experience HERE.)there were four sealings going on at the same time. The waiting room was packed with visitors waiting to witness those sealings, and the temple workers managed the schedule with precision and detail. It was a process. And those were just the sealings going on at that same time. They were booked this way for most of the morning. Well, in St. Louis we were the main event for the day. As we came to the recommend desk the workers explained that the whole temple was waiting for us. And they treated us wonderfully. After getting the kids situated in the children's waiting area Herman and I came back downstairs to get dressed in white. My temple attendant asked me if I minded using the bridal room to change since no one else was using it today. Would I mind???? No, I would not mind. I was THRILLED. Such a beautiful room! I don't know what it was about that room, but as I stood in front of the giant mirror, dressed all in white, and looked at myself before I headed to meet Herman I felt BEAUTIFUL. Just that morning as I was getting ready in the hotel I was noticing that suddenly my nose seemed enormous, and my skin looked blotchy, and my eyes were all puffy, and my skin was starting to look droopy. I found so many flaws. But as I stood alone and saw myself in the bridal room that day I noticed none of that. Was it the awesome lighting? Magic mirrors? No. I think it was just the place I was in. The Spirit was so strong there. I could feel Heavenly Father's love so purely. How could I not feel beautiful in an atmosphere like that? I've only been able to use the bridal room once before, obviously -- when Herman and I were married nineteen years ago. But at that time there was so much hustle and bustle as I was getting into my wedding gown and preparing for the sealing. Lots of people were there helping me. Today I was alone, and it was so, so wonderful because I was able to take a few moments to just stand before the mirror and think about where my life has come in all these years. I was able to think about the amazing blessing of having the Gospel in my life. And Herman -- my rock, my strength, my eternal love, my best friend in the world. Well, I couldn't imagine my life without him. And my wonderful, amazing, talented, caring, and strong children. They are everything I wish I had been at their ages. They have a love for the Gospel that amazes me constantly. They make good choices, not because they have to, but because they want to. They bring such joy to my life. And they are my ETERNAL family. I just felt so, so blessed at that moment, and I was grateful that I could experience it in solitude for a few minutes before the sealing. 

Minsy after her big day!

Now I'm just going to talk about my feelings instead of any specifics about the experience. I will just say that seeing all of my children together, dressed in white ... I just can't describe my feelings. It was perfect. Absolutely perfect. Seeing all of us stretched out in infinity as we looked into the mirrors together. That is just what it is all about. It was sweet to look around the room and see Herman's family who traveled to St. Louis to share in this day with us. And there were also lots of temple workers who came to witness it as well. I heard several of them remark "What a sweet family!" as they were leaving the room. I totally agree! 

We got a few minutes to stand together at the end of the ceremony, after almost everyone had left the room. After kissing all the kids we came in for a giant Blau hug, and Herman looked each of the kids in the eye and said, "We've all got to make it. Okay? We're all going to make it! We have to." It may be years before we ever have all of our children together in a sealing room like that again. As I looked at each of my seven children I knew that I didn't want any of them to be missing ... ever. Seeing all of them -- all of us -- together that day ... well, it was like I got a glimpse into what it could be like in heaven. It was perfect! I want to see each of them at our eternal family table in heaven. No empty chairs! 

My eternal family ...
Best Anniversary Present Ever!

So Team Blau is now officially complete! As we left the temple Hyrum looked at me and said, "Mom, this was the best day ever!" It was a wonderful day, one that I hope that I will never, ever forget. Every struggle, every sacrifice, every choice to do good in the face of evil ... it is all worth it if my family can be with me forever. One of the great gifts that today brought me was the chance to visually see what my heart already knows ... My family is eternal!

So Why Exactly Did I Do That?

I don't know why I feel the need to use cats
to express my thoughts in these blogs.
I just do.
Besides, they are super cute, aren't they?

This is going to be an interesting post. Not really interesting in that "Wow! That's so amazingly cool!" sort of way, but interesting in that I am really stressing out about how to say what I want to say in it. I have all of these thoughts running through my head that are begging to be let free, but so many of them are intertwined with conversations that I have had with Laney that are not really the type of thing that I feel free to share with the blogging world. I will need to thread the needle here as I write, accurately expressing my thoughts without speaking out of turn as I discuss Laney's life and feelings. So, like I say, it'll be an interesting post. Just bear with me, and for Laney's sake, try not to make any assumptions about situations or experiences that I discuss. There may or may not be a story here. All I know is that whatever story there is is not mine to tell. I'm just going to stick to talking about a thought that struck me this week in my ongoing saga: How to Be a Parent Without Ruining My Children's Lives. Episode #2587. (SPOILER ALERT: We have absolutely NO idea what we are doing!)

Those of you who are my loyal blog followers -- do I even have loyal blog followers? -- might remember a post I made back in March entitled "Pardon Me While I Gush for a Moment." I know you've got all of my posts memorized, right? Well, if you want to refresh your memory you can read it HERE, or you can find it on the right side of this blog toward the bottom of the popular posts section. Or if you want the quick summary: In this somewhat rambling post I talked about Herman's and my philosophy when it comes to how our children date. I talked about Laney and the super good choices that she is making in her life, and then I bemoaned the fact that there did not seem to be any young men in the world who verbally recognized the young women for the good choices that they were making. Then I told of a young man (who remained nameless during the post) who had put a note on Laney's facebook wall explaining that he had read her blog and her mormon.org profile. He thanked her for them and the good example she was to him. I went on to gush about how super grateful I was to that young man for those kind words he left for Laney. And I was. And I still am. I know I cannot adequately explain just how grateful I am for his words. So I won't even try to explain. I just am.

Well, today I want to give that young man a name. I think I'll call him George. No. I'll give you his real name. Just don't go stalk him or anything after this post. He's a good boy. I need to tell a bit about him so that I can explain the parenting epiphany I had this week in a way that makes some sense. The first time I heard about Heath Tenney was after Laney returned home from EFY 2011. I don't think that Laney even remembers this conversation, but I haven't forgotten. She was showing me all of the many pictures she took of her friends during the week, and eventually she came to this picture:

Now it isn't every day that I see a picture of Laney and some guy licking walls together. So that picture stood out a bit from the rest. I asked who this guy was, and Laney gave a highly complimentary explanation of who he was. After her remarks I said that he sounded super awesome, and Laney said to me, "He really is Mom, but Heath is that guy that ALL the girls love. He'd never look at me twice." Now, as she said this she wasn't moping or sad or anything like that. She was just stating what she felt was an obvious fact about Heath. But those words struck me hard. Why would she say such a thing? Why wouldn't somebody like Heath ever look at Laney twice? I stopped her and asked her why she thought that. She said, "Well, you know. All the other girls are so cute, and so fun. I don't know. It just seems like he would be more likely to notice them." I had to nip those thoughts in the bud. I explained my thoughts which went along the lines of: Do you know why there are young men out there who ALL the girls love? It's because they are NICE guys who treat everyone with kindness and respect, have stellar testimonies, and are great examples to everyone around them. Of course all the girls would like them! Do you know who those guys choose to focus on when they are in the mood to focus on specific girls? NICE girls who treat everyone with kindness and respect, have stellar testimonies, and are great examples to everyone around them! And that is Laney, the epitome of uber-kindness and enthusiastic testimony. So I finished the conversation by saying, "You know, Laney. You are right. It is probably true that this Heath Tenney will never look at you twice. BUT, one day, someday, there will be some "Heath Tenney" out there who WILL look at you twice. Because you are amazing. And somebody will see that. It just probably won't be for a few years." I told her that she had one job, and that was to be everything that she truly is, no more or no less. Be Laney, and someday someone would appreciate that. (And, just to be clear, I didn't just say that Laney was amazing because it is written in my parenting contract that I have to say that my kids are amazing. I really do believe that she is amazing!) I'm sure that I finished that conversation thinking, "Wow! What a great Mom Moment!"  But I'm sure Laney just tossed it into her brain file that holds all of her "Mom-making-a-bigger-deal-of-a-comment-than-she-needed-to" statements.

So, that was a long-winded explanation of a relatively short conversation that Laney and I had over a year ago. I remembered that conversation, not because of Heath particularly, but because of Laney's belief that the "superstars" were out of her reach. I hate to use the word superstar here, but I don't know any better way to label these young men who are top-notch members of the Church. So it'll have to do for now.

To make a long explanatory story shorter, Heath eventually sent her the sweet facebook note that I mentioned earlier. The two of them ended up going to EFY again together in Bloomington, Indiana, and they were in the same group again. They struck up a close friendship during the week. I'll let Laney do the explaining about that. She wrote about it in her blog HERE. On Friday of that week Laney called Herman to ask if it was okay if she came back to Indiana in two weeks for a group date, and Herman agreed. How could he not? We'd already made a huge deal about how we were totally willing to drive Laney anywhere to date good, righteous young men. It just happens that this was the first time Laney actually made the plans. Usually it was something Herman cooked up, and Laney patiently agreed. So we really needed to support her in this.

Well, last weekend was that big shebang. Laney and I left Waynesville at 4 am on Saturday morning, and Laney met Heath around 10:30. Then I went on a long adventure through the outskirts of Indianapolis, coming close to throwing Sally, our usually dependable, but surprisingly awful Indy direction giver GPS, out the window. And Laney went out and had an awesome time with Heath. That's the short story of the weekend. I think I'll keep it at that for this post.  Like I say, I'm threading the needle here.

But that story is not exactly what I wanted to write about in this post. I want to explain why I suddenly discovered that coming to Indianapolis this weekend was so important. Right before we left I was talking to my brother, and I told him that I was going to drive Laney this weekend. He said, "Let me get this straight. You are going to drive Laney all the way to Indianapolis ... for a DATE?" Yeah, I guess when you phrase it that way it does sound a touch over the top. But it is what it is. I don't feel like it was too much to do. But why exactly was I willing to drive Laney all the way to Indianapolis for a date? Good question. I thought I knew the answer, but this weekend I think that I realized that maybe the answer I would have given a few months ago is not the answer that I would give now.

You know, I always thought that the reason that it was so important for our kids to go on lots of dates with good LDS kids was because we wanted them to make sure that they would always be dating people who would be worthy to take them to the temple eventually. Obviously, for the most part, the people they are dating at this point in their life are not dating people with the end goal of a temple marriage. It is more of a practice run, giving them the experiences they will need so that they will be prepared when they are ready to start making eternal sorts of decisions. I explained all of that in my gushing post that I cited above, and there's a bit more of an explanation in my My Disturbing Realization post HERE. But, you know, Laney has never, ever really questioned whether or not she would be marrying in the temple. It is just going to happen. Without a doubt. And she was going to do whatever it takes to get there. So she really didn't need to be driven all over the country to convince her that she needed to date good, righteous young men. She already knew that and made that requirement for herself.

But after Laney came back to the hotel on Saturday night after her day with Heath we had a little conversation. It was pretty short because by this time she was exhausted after a long, eventful day. So we didn't talk a lot, and we didn't talk much in depth, but Laney said a couple of things that made me think. So even though it was late, and I was pretty tired, I sat up for a long time and thought about some of the things that Laney had said. And do you know what I realized? I realized that there was another danger to living out in the middle of nowhere that I hadn't really thought of before. It's nothing crazy or so dangerous that our kids are in true peril or anything like that. But it is something that we will need to be aware of as all of our children grow up.

I know. It's another long Melissa post, but bear with me here.

Laney has never lacked for dates. Like I wrote in my Gushing post, Herman has been actively setting her up with guys since she turned 16. So much of this was kind of groundbreaking in this area because so many of the youth were not group dating, and if they dated at all, it was with the intention of forming boyfriend/girlfriend relationships. That has driven Herman crazy. He wanted this tradition to change, and Laney was the lucky girl who got to try and lead the way in this. So she went out with lots of different young men from the stake and a few from outside the area. And with the help of a few of her friends it seems as if the tradition is changing here in a small way. Hurray for that!

I have to put a small disclaimer here. When I talk about the lack of "superstar" young men it will probably sound as if I'm saying that the young men in our stake are just a bunch of losers. That is not true. Not at all. There are lots of top notch young men in all of the units of our stake. What separates the "superstars" from the ordinary great guys in my opinion is the enthusiasm they have for the Gospel. It isn't just a set of expectations that they meet, but it is something that they do because they LOVE it. And there aren't a lot of guys anywhere that quite reach that standard. And there definitely aren't a lot of young men who are open about their enthusiasm for the Gospel. There aren't exactly a lot of young women that reach that standard either. And lots of these young men and women, although they aren't at superstar status yet, will eventually reach it. I'm not condemning everyone here.

But here is the problem with living in an area with a limited number of "superstar" young men. When there are a dozen "superstar" young women, but only one or two "superstar" young men, it is almost a given that some of those young women are not going to be dating those super young men. Ever. It's a simple law of averages here. Too many young women, not enough young men. It really hasn't been that big of a deal. Laney has never, ever complained at all about this. And I haven't really worried that much about it. While they plan their group dates Laney's friends might end up on the date with the superstars (Ugh! I've got to figure out a better descriptive word for them!), and Laney would go out with someone else. A lot of the time Laney would choose to ask out the guys who didn't get the opportunity to go on dates much. And I have always loved this about Laney. She can go out with anyone and make them feel comfortable and respected. Sometimes her patience and kindness amaze me. And I know there are a few moms out there who LOVE Laney because she is the only girl at this age who can date their sons who might have personality quirks that make other girls shy away from them.

As I talked to Laney on Saturday night, though, I started to see that maybe one of the risks of growing up in this area is that Laney might start to believe that the most stellar young men are out of her league. I wondered if Laney was coming to think that those young men would always choose the other girls, and not her, when it came time to choose a person to date. She never said this. So I'm reading a lot into her words (but I think that that was one of the things I agreed to do in my parenting contract too). Herman thinks that I am overthinking everything -- that Laney's feelings in this area are just typical teenage girl anxiety.  Maybe so. But it did make me think about how important it was for us to give her opportunities to date stellar young men so that she could begin to see her own awesomeness when it comes to the dating pool. Now, I don't want anyone to think that Laney is sitting around bemoaning her lack of great qualities. She's not. Laney has a great understanding of her own self worth. She doesn't struggle with feelings of insecurity like I did at her age. She is a bright, confident young woman. She's talented. And there are people out there who will appreciate those great qualities in her.

So that's why I didn't bat an eye about driving her to Indianapolis for a date with Heath. He is definitely stellar. And I know that he appreciates Laney for who she is. And I am grateful for that. Having such a great weekend of activities with Heath was very good for Laney. They seem to have a great friendship for only having known each other for so little time. That makes me happy.

It's got to be hard for Laney to be the big experiment in our parenting adventures. We really are trying to do our best, and I know we have to be failing miserably some of the time. But driving to Indianapolis was something that I consider a privilege. I'd do it again in a heartbeat -- but probably not next week or anything like that. We do have some limits.

I just love this picture!
To me, it shows Laney's personality so well!

Forever Matters

Draper Utah LDS Temple

I lost it during the hug -- that big, no-holds-barred hug that was dripping with emotion. Two grown men hugging with so much feeling was hard not to notice. Lots of people in the room noticed it, but not everyone knew the story behind it. I knew. So I cried. And I'm not really a cry in the temple sort of lady. But I was just overwhelmed at that moment. As we exited the temple some people who were in attendance at the sealing of JD Lindsay and his wife Katie came up to Herman to ask who he was exactly. He wasn't JD's dad, but there was obviously some deep sort of relationship there. As one of the ladies at the sealing said, "I knew after that hug that there had to be some sort of story there." And boy was there!

I always have a hard time describing what our relationship to JD really is. At the sealing Herman described us as friends of his from Missouri. That works I guess. In some ways I almost view JD as our just-like-a-son. But really he is only a few years younger than us, so that doesn't quite fit. I just feel such an emotional tie to him, a responsibility to make sure he is doing okay in the world. I can't quite explain it without it sounding weird, I think, so I guess I'll just explain the story of how our life has interacted with JD's, and perhaps that will explain things better.

Several years ago -- I guess it may have been more than ten years -- Herman was teaching Spanish at the high school and serving as a counselor in our bishopric at church. But one day Herman got a very strong impression that he was supposed to work for CES as a full time seminary teacher for the Church. This wasn't one of those "hey, wouldn't it be awesome if ..." sort of impressions. No. This was a super strong prompting to do whatever it took to be hired by CES to teach for the Church. We fasted and prayed about this, and both Herman and I got very real and very powerful answers that this was exactly what the Lord wanted for him to do. Getting hired by CES is not exactly a piece of cake. Lots of people want to be hired, so there is heavy competition, and many super stellar people still don't make the cut. Herman was/is an excellent teacher, but he still was going to have to fight an uphill battle. The matter was complicated even further because Herman was living in Missouri with a full time job already. The most common way to be hired at that time (and maybe today as well) is to go through an intense program in Utah. It wasn't essential, but those candidates had a bit of an upper edge in the process. Herman went about finding out exactly what he was required to do from Missouri, and he immediately asked our bishop if he could be assigned to be the early morning seminary teacher for our area. That is not generally a calling that people volunteer for, so I think the bishop only blinked a few seconds before releasing Herman from the bishopric and assigning him to seminary. Step one complete! 

But now came the real kicker. The CES supervisors wanted to see that Herman could teach in a normal seminary setting. He had already been doing an awesome job teaching every day at the high school, but they wanted to see him teach the same size seminary classes. That was a problem. At the time there were only three or four active youth in the area. Three or four! That is mind boggling to me to think of at this time. Now we have around forty seminary students and four teachers. At the time they could only find three or four. Amazing! Herman was obviously going to have to do some serious recruiting. And that is where JD comes into the picture. Herman had been JD's mom's home teacher for awhile, so he knew all about JD. He loves to tell the story of the first times he visited their home when JD would run upstairs and hide from him. And I don't blame JD at all. Herman just has that sort of personality that screams "commitment pattern." You just know when he enters the room that you will leave the room having agreed to do something you hadn't planned on doing. So maybe JD was wise to hide out.

But Herman could be persistent. He felt urged to bring JD to seminary that year. But JD hadn't even been coming to church. How do you inspire a kid who hasn't even been coming to church to wake up and show up for religious study at 6 am every morning? That was going to be a tough product to sell. Herman was going to need some extra leverage. And Heavenly Father sent some. We had a friend who was buying super cheap houses from auctions and repos, and then fixing them up to use as rentals. He bought one house on the hill overlooking the downtown Waynesville area, and it was a real dump. There was a giant hole in the roof that made the entire house ruined. Mark asked Herman to gut the entire thing and rebuild it for him. At the time we were looking for all sorts of ways to make extra money, so Herman agreed to do the job. He hired JD to be his gopher for the summer. Word on the street was that JD was not the fastest or most enthusiastic worker on the planet. I'm not really sure if he really ended up helping us much as we worked on that house. And to be honest the house took forever to finish and didn't really end up helping us much financially either. But in that crazy construction process Herman and JD formed a bit of a bond. And I think that JD became willing to give Herman a chance and see how seminary would work for him. 

Herman tells this story so much better than me, so I don't really know all of the details.  All I know is that JD started coming to seminary and never looked back. He completed the three years of seminary he had left and then he went back and did an entire year on his own so that he could graduate with a four year diploma. He stayed super active in the Church and headed to BYU after his high school graduation. He then served an honorable mission in Mexico, returning to the US to finish his degree. Now he is in law school, still active in the Church. You would have never guessed that this kid who avoided Herman all those years ago would turn into the man he has become.

And that leads to the events of yesterday. JD was getting sealed yesterday, and he invited us to come. It has ended up being a super crazy summer for us though. We are still in the process of getting our new business up and rolling, and it seems as if we have been driving all over the country lately. It was looking like we weren't going to be able to attend. But I really, really, really thought that Herman needed to be there if no one else. He has been there for JD through everything. He needed to be there. But with all of our waffling about whether we were going to go or not we put off making a decision until the last minute. That meant that plane tickets were obscenely expensive. I just couldn't stomach paying as much for a ticket to Utah as we spent for our ticket to China. Herman was going to have to drive. He wasn't too worried about this. He is used to driving all over the country. But it would still be a majorly long haul. The only question was who would drive with him. Laney is always willing to tag along on Herman's trips to Utah, but ultimately we decided that I would come. I had some serious reservations about coming. I felt like I needed to stay closer to Missouri in case I needed to help my dad out. I also was a bit worried about leaving the kids for that time. But we decided that we were just going to jet out there in a day, see the sealing, and jet back. It wouldn't be too long of a trip. So we were all set.

Just as a side note -- we live in such a GORGEOUS country! Simply gorgeous! We decided to take the longer scenic route and take I-70 through the Rocky Mountains and then head north to Provo. Words just can't describe it. They just can't. Absolutely beautiful! Every change in scenery brought new wonder of the gorgeous creation that is the western US. And as a bonus Herman and I were able to hang out as travel buddies in a way that we haven't done since we were first married. It was great to see that we still can have such a blast together after all these years. We were giggling like ten year-olds coming through the mountains of Colorado. Mostly because I was suffering from a bit of sleep deprivation and came out of a nap, only to freak out because I thought the car in front of us was a buffalo crossing the interstate. That's right. A buffalo. So Herman had to point at every car from then on out and say "Tatonka." It's probably one of those "you had to be there" jokes. We had so much fun! 

As for the sealing -- well, I don't think I can write well enough to really touch on my feelings as I sat there. As JD walked into the room with Katie I immediately started crying. What was going on here? I am not normally a crier. But I couldn't stop. And, of course, there were no tissues anywhere near me. But as JD walked in I just felt an overwhelming feeling, and I KNEW without a doubt just how much Heavenly Father loves JD. So, so much. He loves him so much that he would inspire a man to do whatever he could to get him to come to seminary. He would make sure that this man would NEVER give up. Never. I happen to be really jaded when it comes to Herman and his wonderful abilities, but even I can recognize that there are times when he will give up on individuals temporarily to work with others who might be easier to reach. But Heavenly Father would not let Herman abandon JD. You know, Herman never was hired by CES, and that might lead some people to question why in the world Herman had been inspired that he was meant to be a full time seminary teacher. Some might even question Herman's ability to receive revelation for himself. But I knew at that moment in the temple that Herman was inspired to teach seminary because it was the only way that Heavenly Father could have reached JD at that point in his life. Who knows how his life trajectory would have gone if Herman had abandoned him? Heavenly Father needed for someone to reach JD because Heavenly Father was not willing to give him up. I felt those feelings so strongly as I sat there and watched him enter the room. Heavenly Father loves JD.

And now for the story of that hug. The sealing ceremony was wonderful. They had an excellent sealer, and I couldn't help but get excited for the 24th when we will take our entire family to the St. Louis temple to be sealed to Minsy forever. Seeing the gathering that was there that day, and seeing those who were missing made me decide then and there that I would live my life in such a way so that I would NEVER miss any moments like these in the lives of my children and grandchildren. When we reunite in Heaven someday I do not want to be separated. We all HAVE to be there! So I have to live for that TODAY.

As the ceremony ended the sealer asked Katie's mom and dad and JD's grandma if they could come forward and give congratulatory hugs to the couple. Then it was Herman's turn. As he came forward and grabbed onto JD with fervor I couldn't help but think about how we will greet one another in the hereafter. You could see the language of that hug, and you could see the ETERNAL gratitude that JD had to Herman for the friendship and guidance he gave him as he was growing up. To say that JD was there that day because of Herman sounds on paper a bit cocky. So maybe it is better to say that JD was there that day because Heavenly Father loved him enough to influence Herman to be there for him when he most needed him to be. How many people will greet us in heaven with tears of gratitude for the work we have done to save them in their times of trouble? It was such an amazing and beautiful moment, and I just know I am not giving the moment the words that it deserves. All I could do was cry. I wanted to pause the moment and explain to everyone there exactly what sort of bond those two men held so that everyone could experience the moment with the same level of power that I was feeling. But I was content to just cry it out on my own. As Katie's family greeted Herman and thanked him for all that he did for JD I realized how saving one boy has ended up influencing so many others. It is amazing (I know I'm saying amazing too much!) to think about Heavenly Father's power to change lives. I know that He can do this. I know that so many times in this world when He chooses to send angels to minister to us He sends ordinary people to do the job. Herman was an ordinary man trying his best to serve the Lord and do His will. He thought he was doing His will for one purpose, but it has ended up being something entirely different. And ultimately saving JD will prove to be more important and more eternal than any full time seminary position could have ever been. 

What a choice, choice experience for me. I am soooo grateful that I was able to attend this amazing sealing  ceremony. It was probably the best one I have ever witnessed (outside of my own of course). Once again, my testimony of Heavenly Father's immense love for us as individuals was strengthened. I know that He knows who we are, and I know that He will move the mountains in our path to help us find our way back to Him someday. What a blessing to be part of such an amazing Gospel with knowledge of His plan for ME!

Katie, JD, and Herman outside the Draper Temple after the sealing.

Ten Things I'd Rather Be Doing Than My Taxes in July

To keep on the topic of weirdness that I have been on lately ... I have a confession to make. When I was a little younger I LOVED to fill out my tax forms. That's right ... LOVED with all caps (that's some serious love!). It was just so orderly and neat. I could pull together my forms from my employer and my bank and pump out a completed return in less than half an hour. That was when it was just me ... easy peasy. It got a bit more complicated when Herman entered the picture -- maybe tacking on an extra fifteen minutes to my prep time. But even as we welcomed child (deduction in IRS talk) after child, buying a home, and entering the full time work force after college, our taxes were not not terribly hard to do. I barely had to read the directions, and I felt confident that I would have an accurate and legal form to turn into the government. 

Things were pretty simple for us while Herman worked for the school district. Every document we needed was neatly put together for us at the very beginning of the year, and I was always able to get our taxes done by the first week in February, excited to receive a refund check that would purchase some necessary item we were waiting to have enough money to buy. But by the turn of the century (that phrase sure made it sound like it was ages ago) the beginning of the end of my smiling tax preparation days had arrived. We became landlords with the purchase of a triplex at that time. With that came lots of expenses, maintenance fees, utility fees, rents received, lots of paperwork. And with the purchase of that property things got a bit more complicated. I was unable to figure things out on my own, but with the help of TurboTax I was able to answer the questions that let the program generate the tax form for me. A little more time consuming and confusing ... but manageable.

Oh for the return of those days ...

Things very quickly moved to the ridiculously confusing stage when it came to tax preparation. We continued to buy properties right and left, soon starting a company to put these properties in so that we could separate the property management from our personal stuff. I opened up TurboTax to do my taxes one year and realized that our tax picture was so complicated that I couldn't even understand the questions that TurboTax was asking me. We knew that we were going to have to go to an accountant. Luckily we found a very nice and good one who helped us finish our taxes. What seemed crazily daunting to me was a breeze for him. I think he was grateful for the chance to do something so simple in comparison of his normal tax business.

So things should be smoother now, right? Not really.

The Blau business picture got more and more complicated as Herman left the school district to start up a company with his friend Mark. And then they formed another company. And another company. And soon we formed a company on our own. And another company. And all along the way our investment company, Symphonic Investments, continued to buy more and more houses. Things were AMAZINGLY complex. I could barely wrap my head around our tax life. I was totally convinced that someday we would be audited because I had missed some crucial piece of information needed for taxes.

This was the end of our days as tax filers by April 15th. No. Every year we had to file an extension in order to have until October to get our stuff filed. Even with the extension we were fighting to get the stuff ready by the later due date. It wasn't just a matter of our accountant figuring out how to file everything. I had to have the stuff to give him so that he knew what to deduct and add. It was maddening. I consider myself to be a relatively good file keeper and organizer when it comes to documents and receipts, but I would get so incredibly flustered trying to gather things into a decipherable pile of info. There is nothing, NOTHING I think in the world that I am asked to do that puts me in a fouler mood than trying to prepare our stuff to take to the accountant. That job that I used to LOVE (all caps) when I was young and stupid? Now I hated it with a passion to rival all passion. It may be the one task on earth that is close to revert to the language of my teen years and curse up a storm. I never quite get to that point ... limiting myself to some well timed grunts and urgs.

Taxes make the normal relaxed, laid back, and happy me become ...

Irritable.

Anxious.

And a bit gollum-y by the end of the process.

So today it is July 10th, the perfect day to hand in my tax stuff to the accountant, right? I feel bad that I am actually really proud of myself for getting the stuff turned in before the month of October. But even though I went to our accountant with a mountain of info I still left with a pile of accountant homework to do. There are still several items I need to gather. So all is not done. I have a few things left to do before tax year 2011 can belong to the history books for Team Blau. Urg!

But for now I've had enough taxes for the day/week/month. Okay. I'll finish up tomorrow. Maybe. 

Until then, here are ten things I'd rather be doing than my taxes in July:

Finally Scrapbook Our China Trip.

Family Float Trip.

Bake Some Bread.

Watch Pride and Prejudice
for the 10,000 time.

Sing the entire score of
Les Miserables ... all parts.

Get a Pedicure.

Read a Book.

Write a Book.

Family Dance-a-Thon.
And yes ... we really look like this when we dance! 

Eat Lemons.

Oh how I hate gathering my tax docs! But at least I can say that today I am one step closer to being done. And here's to Tax Year 2012! I hoping that I can be so super organized that we'll be able to get this nasty process done in the first quarter of the year, giving me time to enjoy the rest of my year in peace.

And just for Spencer ... a little Beatles. Karaoke!