Forever Matters

Draper Utah LDS Temple

I lost it during the hug -- that big, no-holds-barred hug that was dripping with emotion. Two grown men hugging with so much feeling was hard not to notice. Lots of people in the room noticed it, but not everyone knew the story behind it. I knew. So I cried. And I'm not really a cry in the temple sort of lady. But I was just overwhelmed at that moment. As we exited the temple some people who were in attendance at the sealing of JD Lindsay and his wife Katie came up to Herman to ask who he was exactly. He wasn't JD's dad, but there was obviously some deep sort of relationship there. As one of the ladies at the sealing said, "I knew after that hug that there had to be some sort of story there." And boy was there!

I always have a hard time describing what our relationship to JD really is. At the sealing Herman described us as friends of his from Missouri. That works I guess. In some ways I almost view JD as our just-like-a-son. But really he is only a few years younger than us, so that doesn't quite fit. I just feel such an emotional tie to him, a responsibility to make sure he is doing okay in the world. I can't quite explain it without it sounding weird, I think, so I guess I'll just explain the story of how our life has interacted with JD's, and perhaps that will explain things better.

Several years ago -- I guess it may have been more than ten years -- Herman was teaching Spanish at the high school and serving as a counselor in our bishopric at church. But one day Herman got a very strong impression that he was supposed to work for CES as a full time seminary teacher for the Church. This wasn't one of those "hey, wouldn't it be awesome if ..." sort of impressions. No. This was a super strong prompting to do whatever it took to be hired by CES to teach for the Church. We fasted and prayed about this, and both Herman and I got very real and very powerful answers that this was exactly what the Lord wanted for him to do. Getting hired by CES is not exactly a piece of cake. Lots of people want to be hired, so there is heavy competition, and many super stellar people still don't make the cut. Herman was/is an excellent teacher, but he still was going to have to fight an uphill battle. The matter was complicated even further because Herman was living in Missouri with a full time job already. The most common way to be hired at that time (and maybe today as well) is to go through an intense program in Utah. It wasn't essential, but those candidates had a bit of an upper edge in the process. Herman went about finding out exactly what he was required to do from Missouri, and he immediately asked our bishop if he could be assigned to be the early morning seminary teacher for our area. That is not generally a calling that people volunteer for, so I think the bishop only blinked a few seconds before releasing Herman from the bishopric and assigning him to seminary. Step one complete! 

But now came the real kicker. The CES supervisors wanted to see that Herman could teach in a normal seminary setting. He had already been doing an awesome job teaching every day at the high school, but they wanted to see him teach the same size seminary classes. That was a problem. At the time there were only three or four active youth in the area. Three or four! That is mind boggling to me to think of at this time. Now we have around forty seminary students and four teachers. At the time they could only find three or four. Amazing! Herman was obviously going to have to do some serious recruiting. And that is where JD comes into the picture. Herman had been JD's mom's home teacher for awhile, so he knew all about JD. He loves to tell the story of the first times he visited their home when JD would run upstairs and hide from him. And I don't blame JD at all. Herman just has that sort of personality that screams "commitment pattern." You just know when he enters the room that you will leave the room having agreed to do something you hadn't planned on doing. So maybe JD was wise to hide out.

But Herman could be persistent. He felt urged to bring JD to seminary that year. But JD hadn't even been coming to church. How do you inspire a kid who hasn't even been coming to church to wake up and show up for religious study at 6 am every morning? That was going to be a tough product to sell. Herman was going to need some extra leverage. And Heavenly Father sent some. We had a friend who was buying super cheap houses from auctions and repos, and then fixing them up to use as rentals. He bought one house on the hill overlooking the downtown Waynesville area, and it was a real dump. There was a giant hole in the roof that made the entire house ruined. Mark asked Herman to gut the entire thing and rebuild it for him. At the time we were looking for all sorts of ways to make extra money, so Herman agreed to do the job. He hired JD to be his gopher for the summer. Word on the street was that JD was not the fastest or most enthusiastic worker on the planet. I'm not really sure if he really ended up helping us much as we worked on that house. And to be honest the house took forever to finish and didn't really end up helping us much financially either. But in that crazy construction process Herman and JD formed a bit of a bond. And I think that JD became willing to give Herman a chance and see how seminary would work for him. 

Herman tells this story so much better than me, so I don't really know all of the details.  All I know is that JD started coming to seminary and never looked back. He completed the three years of seminary he had left and then he went back and did an entire year on his own so that he could graduate with a four year diploma. He stayed super active in the Church and headed to BYU after his high school graduation. He then served an honorable mission in Mexico, returning to the US to finish his degree. Now he is in law school, still active in the Church. You would have never guessed that this kid who avoided Herman all those years ago would turn into the man he has become.

And that leads to the events of yesterday. JD was getting sealed yesterday, and he invited us to come. It has ended up being a super crazy summer for us though. We are still in the process of getting our new business up and rolling, and it seems as if we have been driving all over the country lately. It was looking like we weren't going to be able to attend. But I really, really, really thought that Herman needed to be there if no one else. He has been there for JD through everything. He needed to be there. But with all of our waffling about whether we were going to go or not we put off making a decision until the last minute. That meant that plane tickets were obscenely expensive. I just couldn't stomach paying as much for a ticket to Utah as we spent for our ticket to China. Herman was going to have to drive. He wasn't too worried about this. He is used to driving all over the country. But it would still be a majorly long haul. The only question was who would drive with him. Laney is always willing to tag along on Herman's trips to Utah, but ultimately we decided that I would come. I had some serious reservations about coming. I felt like I needed to stay closer to Missouri in case I needed to help my dad out. I also was a bit worried about leaving the kids for that time. But we decided that we were just going to jet out there in a day, see the sealing, and jet back. It wouldn't be too long of a trip. So we were all set.

Just as a side note -- we live in such a GORGEOUS country! Simply gorgeous! We decided to take the longer scenic route and take I-70 through the Rocky Mountains and then head north to Provo. Words just can't describe it. They just can't. Absolutely beautiful! Every change in scenery brought new wonder of the gorgeous creation that is the western US. And as a bonus Herman and I were able to hang out as travel buddies in a way that we haven't done since we were first married. It was great to see that we still can have such a blast together after all these years. We were giggling like ten year-olds coming through the mountains of Colorado. Mostly because I was suffering from a bit of sleep deprivation and came out of a nap, only to freak out because I thought the car in front of us was a buffalo crossing the interstate. That's right. A buffalo. So Herman had to point at every car from then on out and say "Tatonka." It's probably one of those "you had to be there" jokes. We had so much fun! 

As for the sealing -- well, I don't think I can write well enough to really touch on my feelings as I sat there. As JD walked into the room with Katie I immediately started crying. What was going on here? I am not normally a crier. But I couldn't stop. And, of course, there were no tissues anywhere near me. But as JD walked in I just felt an overwhelming feeling, and I KNEW without a doubt just how much Heavenly Father loves JD. So, so much. He loves him so much that he would inspire a man to do whatever he could to get him to come to seminary. He would make sure that this man would NEVER give up. Never. I happen to be really jaded when it comes to Herman and his wonderful abilities, but even I can recognize that there are times when he will give up on individuals temporarily to work with others who might be easier to reach. But Heavenly Father would not let Herman abandon JD. You know, Herman never was hired by CES, and that might lead some people to question why in the world Herman had been inspired that he was meant to be a full time seminary teacher. Some might even question Herman's ability to receive revelation for himself. But I knew at that moment in the temple that Herman was inspired to teach seminary because it was the only way that Heavenly Father could have reached JD at that point in his life. Who knows how his life trajectory would have gone if Herman had abandoned him? Heavenly Father needed for someone to reach JD because Heavenly Father was not willing to give him up. I felt those feelings so strongly as I sat there and watched him enter the room. Heavenly Father loves JD.

And now for the story of that hug. The sealing ceremony was wonderful. They had an excellent sealer, and I couldn't help but get excited for the 24th when we will take our entire family to the St. Louis temple to be sealed to Minsy forever. Seeing the gathering that was there that day, and seeing those who were missing made me decide then and there that I would live my life in such a way so that I would NEVER miss any moments like these in the lives of my children and grandchildren. When we reunite in Heaven someday I do not want to be separated. We all HAVE to be there! So I have to live for that TODAY.

As the ceremony ended the sealer asked Katie's mom and dad and JD's grandma if they could come forward and give congratulatory hugs to the couple. Then it was Herman's turn. As he came forward and grabbed onto JD with fervor I couldn't help but think about how we will greet one another in the hereafter. You could see the language of that hug, and you could see the ETERNAL gratitude that JD had to Herman for the friendship and guidance he gave him as he was growing up. To say that JD was there that day because of Herman sounds on paper a bit cocky. So maybe it is better to say that JD was there that day because Heavenly Father loved him enough to influence Herman to be there for him when he most needed him to be. How many people will greet us in heaven with tears of gratitude for the work we have done to save them in their times of trouble? It was such an amazing and beautiful moment, and I just know I am not giving the moment the words that it deserves. All I could do was cry. I wanted to pause the moment and explain to everyone there exactly what sort of bond those two men held so that everyone could experience the moment with the same level of power that I was feeling. But I was content to just cry it out on my own. As Katie's family greeted Herman and thanked him for all that he did for JD I realized how saving one boy has ended up influencing so many others. It is amazing (I know I'm saying amazing too much!) to think about Heavenly Father's power to change lives. I know that He can do this. I know that so many times in this world when He chooses to send angels to minister to us He sends ordinary people to do the job. Herman was an ordinary man trying his best to serve the Lord and do His will. He thought he was doing His will for one purpose, but it has ended up being something entirely different. And ultimately saving JD will prove to be more important and more eternal than any full time seminary position could have ever been. 

What a choice, choice experience for me. I am soooo grateful that I was able to attend this amazing sealing  ceremony. It was probably the best one I have ever witnessed (outside of my own of course). Once again, my testimony of Heavenly Father's immense love for us as individuals was strengthened. I know that He knows who we are, and I know that He will move the mountains in our path to help us find our way back to Him someday. What a blessing to be part of such an amazing Gospel with knowledge of His plan for ME!

Katie, JD, and Herman outside the Draper Temple after the sealing.