Spencer has really accomplished a remarkable thing this year. He decided after attending EFY last year that he wanted to graduate from high school a year early. We've heard that before from the Blau children. Laney and Savannah both made noise about doing it, but in the end they went the full four years, with Laney adding an interesting twist and homeschooling for her junior year. Spencer, in the past, has not been terribly diligent as a student. He gets great grades, but he's never really had to work at it. In order to graduate early Spencer was going to have to take a full load of classes along with some additional online classes that could help him get the required credits to graduate. Was it possible? Yes. But it didn't seem probable. But there was no harm in going for it. The worst thing that could happen was that Spencer would just have to come back and go to school for that final year. We decided to let him try and see what happened.
He ended up staying at home for the first three hours of the fall semester while he worked on the bigger load of classes he was taking online. He continued to go to school at the end of the day to take some of the harder classes where it would be helpful to have classroom interaction. This choice prevented him from participating in soccer or scholar bowl, two activities he loves, because of the state athletic rules that prevent students from participating in extracurricular competitions unless they attend school full-time. It was a bum deal, but it was a sacrifice Spencer was willing to make. He worked hard during that fall semester. I thought he would struggle to get his assignments completed in the very unstructured schedule presented for online classes. But he did it. Amazingly, he did it. And in the process I think that he became a much more disciplined and conscientious student. This process really matured him as a learner. I think it has made him better prepared for college.
During the second semester Spencer went back to school full-time. He was in a pretty good position to graduate, but it still was uncertain that he would get all the things done that he needed to do. The big concern for him during this final semester was whether or not he could get a nice scholarship to BYU-Idaho, his college of choice. He had a good enough GPA to get a nice scholarship, as long as he could get a 30 on the ACT. His score was already respectable, but he still needed to raise it a couple of points. That would not normally be a problem since he could have an entire year of extra math and science classes that could improve his knowledge base, but because he was trying to graduate early he needed to get that score this year. He basically had one chance to do it in February. That was it. If he didn't get the score he needed he could still get a half-ride scholarship. That would have been okay. But his hope was to have that tuition paid so that he wouldn't have to figure out how to pay for his college. That's right, folks ... we don't pay for our kids' college educations. Neither of us did, and we turned out just fine. We think that our kids need to have the personal responsibility that comes with paying for their own education. It may mean that they can't attend the super expensive school of their choice, but there are still wonderful options for them that make economic sense, and they can still manage to end their schooling without loads of debt. But because of this situation, it was important to Spencer to get as much of his college paid beforehand. He took the test in February ... and he got the 30!!!! Hooray! That made his future plans much simpler. After getting accepted to BYU-Idaho and receiving his scholarship, the only thing left for Spencer to do was to actually graduate ... and he did!
It was a strange thing to watch the graduation activities this time around. This is the third time we've done this. I thought that I'd be sad when I saw Laney graduate since she was our first, but I wasn't. I remember it being a happy occasion. Savannah's graduation was much the same. But this time around I was feeling awfully sad about the whole thing. Sure, I was super proud of Spencer and all that he has managed to accomplish. I was proud of the man he was growing to be. It was nice to see him walking during the Passing of the Torch ceremony and during the actual graduation ceremony that night. But, oh man!, I was super sad at the same time. It just didn't feel right that he was graduating this year. I think that my heart knew that I was owed one more year with him at home. But here he was graduating, ready to head off into the sunset, leaving us here without him. It seemed so wrong.
I still have about three months left to wrap my head around a life without Spencer here. I'm working on it ... or at least I'm trying to. So few people out there really get just how wonderful Spencer is. He's pretty squirrelly at times. He is more likely to tell a joke than to be deep and meaningful in his conversation. He sees the world at an angle, if that makes any sense. While I might look at an issue one way, he is sure to see it in a completely different way. I am sure that many people look at Spencer and just see a boy who isn't interesting in taking life all that seriously. But for those who actually bother to LISTEN to him and HEAR what he is saying, they will find a young man who is compassionate and caring. They will find a young man who is loyal and willing to serve. They will find a young man who is hard working and generous. It's probably a weird thing to do, but I can always judge the depth of a true leader and teacher by how they understand Spencer. Those who are willing to see people in a positive light and look for the good in everyone can find that good in Spencer. Those who are critical of others and view others negatively don't take the time to get to know him, writing him off simply because he doesn't fit into the box they have built for him. I appreciate those who take the time to KNOW my son and see who he truly is. (Not to say that we don't have to often have teaching moments where we have to tell Spencer that he can't always buck the system. He has to play by the rules sometimes, you know?)
Spencer is spending the summer working as a home health aid for my brother, Ryan, who has cerebral palsy. It's not work that just anyone can do. A lot of people might find it too hard. I know that Ryan had a hard time finding people in this area who were willing to do the work to get him ready for his day ... but Spencer has done it without complaint. In fact, he has made some noise about perhaps going into nursing because he has a certain gift for this sort of work. That really surprised me, but it made me smile inside to think that he is becoming his own person. I don't know if I will be able to handle him leaving home so quickly, but I do know that he is ready for whatever the world will throw at him. I can hardly imagine him as a college student. He still seems so young to me. But he has proven that he can approach life with responsibility and determination. In a world where so many of his peers are almost shiftless in their planning for the future, I am glad that Spencer is making a plan and then doing the necessary things to make that plan work.
Sometimes it's hard to be a mom ... but seeing my children succeed and make good choices in their lives makes it all a wonderful ride for me. Here's to the future!
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