On Grapefruit Slices and Hershey Bars

I've never had a migraine headache before.  At least I don't think so.  And judging by the descriptions that my friends have given of the experience I'm almost sure that I never have.  In fact, when I think of migraines my first thought is always of my college roommate who had them every once in a while.  I would always find her lying on her bed in our totally dark dorm room.  She would explain that she was having a monster migraine.  I would think in my head that it was just like any ordinary headache, and I would go about my business just as I would normally.  Thinking back, I'm sure that must have annoyed her to no end because she was probably in an enormous amount of pain.  I should have chosen to grab my things and go hang out in the library or something, but instead I turned on the lights and banged around the room much too loudly.  Oh how much I sometimes wish I could go back and have a redo on moments like that in my life!

So, anyway, I don't think that I've had a migraine before, but yesterday may have come close to what the experience might be like.  I had a late Friday night/Saturday morning.  I drove Laney and three other youth from church up to Columbia for the Priest/Laurel Mormon prom.  What is a Mormon Prom?  I'll explain that in a post later today.  But basically it is pretty much like a regular prom.  It was great fun for me as well as the youth, but I ended up getting home very early Saturday morning.  In the Blau household the world doesn't pause simply because Mom got to bed late.  No.  I was woken up bright and early by several bundles of energy, and there was no going back.  This isn't unusual for me.  I am generally a night owl who can sometimes find myself sitting up alone in the wee hours of the morning if I am engrossed in a particularly awesome book that I can't put down.  I am used to waking up with little sleep at times -- not as much as it used to be when I was younger, but still fairly often.  

Generally when I have a night with little sleep I suffer a bit of a sleep deprivation headache.  If I'm not feeling too stubborn I'll take a Tylenol and maybe have a little nap, and then I'll feel a thousand times better.  The day is saved!  But yesterday my experience was different.  While I was lying in bed I felt just fine -- maybe a little listless, but overall fairly good.  It was Saturday, and when we can the Blau family tries to have Saturdays be VERY low key and laid back.  We take our time getting out of bed and getting started with the day because it is the only day that we have that luxury during the week.  Yesterday was no different, but we couldn't stay in bed all day.  There were activities all over the place we needed to get to, so eventually I had to get out of bed and start living.  Still it was later when I did.

Herman had already left the house to attend auxiliary training at the church.  Spencer had a band competition in Jeff City and needed to be dropped off at the school.  Laney was gone cleaning Nandy's house for her, so I was the designated driver for the morning.  As soon as I hopped out of bed I noticed that I felt weird -- just off.  I couldn't really explain how I felt.  I didn't feel sick.  I didn't feel sleep deprived.  I just felt off.  I didn't bother getting dressed.  I just pulled my fingers through my crazy morning hair, threw on some flip flops and drove him to the school in my jammies.  (Don't judge me!)  We got to the school just fine, but as I was driving home I started to feel queasy and a bit dizzy.  My eyesight even blurred a bit.  I thought that I needed to pull over, but just as quickly as I felt the feeling it was over.  I continued the short trip back to our house and made it alive and well.

But I was not well.  I could tell that a monster headache was coming my way, and this headache was unlike anything that I had ever had before.  My vision was wonky.  I felt queasy and dizzy anytime I stood up to attempt anything.  I just needed to sit down a moment.  Normally I am extremely stubborn when it comes to taking medication.  I think that's hereditary.  I will wait until I am in extreme pain before I ever take something for it.  That drives Herman crazy, I think.  But things were bad yesterday so I grabbed some meds right away.  It took a little while, but they did help, and I was able to get up and get some things done. 

Herman and I headed to Rolla in the afternoon to watch Savannah compete in the district academic bowl competition.  I had never seen one before, and Herman said that they were a lot of fun to watch, so we drove to see Savannah's last competition of the year.  (BTW -- Waynesville lost in the semi-final round, and Savannah placed fifth individually.)  In the middle of the competition I noticed that I started to feel a bit dizzy again, but I was sitting down, so everything was okay.  As we were driving home it started getting worse, so Herman had me open up his glove box to discover that he carries an entire pharmacy with him whenever he travels.  I picked the appropriate drug for the problem and hoped for a quick recovery.

The recovery didn't come all that quickly.  As soon as I arrived back home I headed straight for bed.  I wasn't sick enough to sleep or even so sick that I needed to avoid outside stimuli of any sort.  But I was sick enough that I couldn't really get up and do much of anything yesterday evening.  Herman was wonderful.  He entertained the kids.  He cleaned up the house.  He kept coming in to check on me.  He asked me if I needed anything like a soda or some grapefruit slices.  (I love to buy the refrigerated jars of Del Monte grapefruit slices that are found in many grocery produce sections.  It's one of my little treats to myself.)  I didn't need anything at all, but I appreciated him asking.  I did ask him for a blessing because I felt like this illness (or whatever it was) needed a bit of divine intervention.  He gave me a lovely blessing and then left me to myself again.

At one point in the evening the kids were taking showers, getting ready for bed.  JoJo was using the shower in the master bath and decided that this night he needed help getting the soap rinsed out of his hair.  I didn't feel like I could help out today for fear of toppling into the shower with dizziness, so I sent Katie to find Herman to see if he could help.  Katie looked everywhere and said that Dad was nowhere to be found.  That was weird.  He usually lets us know if he steps out for anything.  But I wasn't too worried.  Help for JoJo was eventually rounded up, and he survived his shower for the night.  

A few minutes later Katie came into the room bringing bounty.  She was holding three things in her arms: 

A Spoon.

A GIANT Hershey's Special Dark Bar.

And Del Monte Grapefruit Slices!

I just couldn't stop staring at them.  Herman knows that I love chocolate.  Okay, I don't just love chocolate. I'm obsessed with chocolate.  I'm addicted to chocolate -- okay, not really, or that would be wrong.  But I do like it very much.  Very, very much.  There are few problems in my life that can't be cured with a healthy dose of chocolate!  Herman didn't just get me a regular old chocolate bar.  He got me a GIANT bar.  Heaven!  And Herman didn't just get me a regular sized jar of grapefruit slices.  He got me a super sized jar with 10 (10!) whole grapefruits inside.  The world will never know what a sacrifice this must have been for Herman.  He has always hated it when I buy these canned grapefruit slices because it would make so much more sense to just buy a grapefruit and peel it myself.  It would certainly be cheaper.  So for him to spring for the biggest jar on the shelf when a small cup of grapefruit slices would have been sufficient was such a token of his feelings for me.  I just can't explain it adequately with words.  Why won't my words let me say this right????  Herman had left the house and made a special trip to the grocery store just to get these things for me.

Well, I couldn't help it.  I started to cry.  Maybe I'm just suffering from a deluge of make-me-cry hormones. Maybe one of the symptoms of this crazy illness is an overabundance of emotion for the smallest little events in life.  I don't know.  But at that moment I was just full of emotion, overwhelmed with gratitude for such a husband.  He wouldn't be perfect for everyone, but he is perfect for me.  I don't know what sort of bargain I entered into in the pre-existence to warrant the blessing of him in my life, but I'm sure glad for whatever it was.  I mean, he got me the extra large jar of grapefruit slices!!!!!!  EXTRA LARGE.  That's just epic.  

It isn't during the way fun and easy going moments of our marriage that I recognize the good match we make as a couple.  Well, I do notice that during those times.  We go well together.  I don't think there are many other people out in the world who could handle my idiosyncrasies, and I am sure that there are very few who could handle Herman's.  So I am happy to have him.  But it is during those times of illness and sadness and difficulties that I really recognize the strength of our relationship.  We don't run away from the bad stuff.  We face it . . . together.  We are both okay on our own I guess, but together we are a FORTRESS.  Bring it on!  

So as I sat on my bed and looked at my giant Hershey bar and my extra large jar of grapefruit slices I was moved to tears thinking of the kindness that those items represented.  I had to pull myself up and drag my dizzy little body into the living room so that I could say thank you.  That may have been the most thoughtful gift I have gotten in a very long time.  I like my diamonds, and I like my pearls, and I even like the Kitchenaid mixer, but it is this now empty (Again, don't judge me!) jar of grapefruit slices and almost empty (I'm saving some for later!) wrapper of chocolate that truly shows me the devotion my sweet eternal companion has for me.  He got these for me when I didn't really need it all that much.  I certainly would have never asked him to make a special trip to Wal-mart to pick them up.  But he simply did it because.  Just because.  And those are the best sorts of gifts I can ever receive.  

I heard this song on Pandora this morning, and I loved it.  It made me think of Herman somehow.  I don't know why.  But here it is.  I love the lyrics and the message.